2. Social Media

Overview

Social media is like a giant digital playground where you can hang out with friends, share cool things, and see what everyone else is doing. It’s all on the internet, and it happens through apps on your smartphone, tablet, or computer. Instead of meeting face-to-face, people connect through photos, videos, messages, and comments. Social media apps can be tons of fun, but they also come with risks if you’re not careful.

By being smart about what you post, who you talk to, and how much you share, you can have a great time while staying safe online. Always protect your privacy and always tell your parents or a trusted adult if you ever feel unsure or uncomfortable with anything on social media.

2.1 How it works

Social media platforms like TikTok, Instagram, and Snapchat are huge in how young people connect and share. They can be lots of fun and a powerful tool for good, but understanding how they truly work and managing your digital wellbeing is key to a healthy online life.

Realising that "My attention is the product being sold" is a crucial step towards more conscious, controlled, and healthier social media use.

  • Free service, hidden price
    Platforms are "free," but they collect massive amounts of your data - everything you click, watch, share, and even what you do outside their apps.

  • Building your digital twin
    This data feeds powerful algorithms that create a detailed profile of you: your habits, interests, and even your potential vulnerabilities. They aim to know you incredibly well, so they can keep you scrolling, swiping or buying.

  • Hooking your attention
    These algorithms are designed to keep you scrolling as long as possible. They personalise your feed with content you're most likely to engage with, using psychological triggers (like endless scroll and notifications) to make platforms addictive.

  • Selling your eyes
    Big Tech doesn't sell your raw data. Instead, they sell advertisers access to your attention, precisely targeting you based on your detailed profile. Advertisers pay mega money to show their ads to the people most likely to buy their products.

    for more on algorithms, see section 4.4.

Managing your digital wellbeing

  • Be Mindful of Your Data: Think critically about what you share and the digital footprint you create.

  • Question Your Feed: Recognise that your feed isn't neutral; it's a highly personalised stream designed to maximise your engagement, sometimes by showing polarising or emotionally charged content.

  • Take Control of Your Time: Knowing platforms are designed to be addictive helps you set boundaries and resist endless scrolling.

  • Protect Your Privacy: Regularly review and adjust your privacy settings to limit data collection.

  • Seek Diverse Information: Actively look for news and perspectives outside your social media bubble to avoid echo chambers which amplify your own views (see section 4.5).

2.2 It’s not reality

When you look through social media, it might seem like everyone else is living a perfect life. Amazing holidays, flawless selfies, people having fun every day. But the truth is that people usually post only the best parts of their lives. What you don’t see are the boring, messy, or tough moments. Just like filters can change a photo, social media can give a filtered version of reality.

Why social media isn’t always reality

  • People share their best moments

    • Most people post the happy, exciting, or perfect parts of their lives.

    • They usually don’t show the boring, hard, or sad times.

  • Photos and videos can be edited

    • Filters, apps, and editing tools can change how people and places look.

    • Sometimes pictures are staged or taken many times to look perfect.

  • Social media can make you compare too much

    • Seeing others’ highlights might make you feel like your life isn’t as good, but remember, everyone has ups and downs.

    • What you see online is not the full story.

  • People can act different online

    • Some people might act cooler, happier, or more confident than they really are.

    • Online profiles can be like a “highlight reel,” not the real, everyday life.

Mariam’s Top Tips for how to keep it real when using socials

Remember It’s Just Part of Life
Everyone has good days and bad days, even if they don’t show it online.

Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
You are unique, and your life is your own story, not a copy of someone else’s.

Be Kind to Yourself
Focus on what makes you happy, not on trying to look perfect online.

Talk About It
If social media makes you feel bad, talk to a friend, family member, or teacher.

2.3 Doomscrolling

You know how sometimes you pick up your phone to just quickly check something, and before you know it, an hour has passed, and you feel… worse? If that "worse" feeling is all about consuming sad, scary, or negative news, then you've probably been doomscrolling. Equally, endless scrolling of any content for a long time can often leave you feeling bad or unfulfilled. Again, more doomscrolling.

Why we do it

Our Brains Look for Danger:
Our brains are wired to pay attention to threats, so negative news grabs us.

The "Information Trap":
We feel like we need to know everything, even if it just increases our worry.

Algorithms Keep Feeding It:
Social media apps show you more of what gets your attention, and upsetting content often does.

What is a dopamine loop?

A cycle where the release of dopamine (released when you are scrolling) reinforces a behaviour leading to its repetition i.e. the more you scroll, the more you want to scroll, hence doomscrolling!

How it can affect you

It can make you feel anxious, stressed, or sad.

It can take away your time and focus from things you enjoy.

It might make you feel like the world is worse than it really is.

It can cause focus and attention problems.

How to stop doomscrolling

Notice when it’s happening
-
Ask yourself: Am I feeling stressed or sad because of what I’m seeing?
- If yes, it might be time to stop.

Set time limits
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Decide how much time you want to spend on social media each day.
- Use phone settings or apps to remind you to take breaks.

Choose positive content
-
Follow pages or people who share happy, funny, or inspiring stuff.
- Look for things that make you feel good or relaxed.

Take breaks
-
Put your phone down and do something you enjoy, like going outside, drawing, or talking with friends.
- Taking breaks helps your brain feel better.

Talk about how you feel
-
If news or posts make you worried, talk to someone you trust such as a friend, family member, or teacher.

2.4 Comparison culture

Comparison culture is when we constantly look at other people's lives (especially on social media) and measure ourselves against them. It's about comparing your own life, looks, achievements, and popularity to what you see others doing or having.

It's not a totally new thing – humans have always compared themselves to others. But social media has amplified the volume, making it way more intense and constant.

Why social media fuels it

The "Highlight Reel"

People only show their best moments online: holidays, new stuff, perfect selfies. You see their "highlights," not their everyday "behind-the-scenes" struggles or boring bits. This makes you feel like your normal life isn't good enough.

Filters & Editing

Photos are often heavily edited to look "perfect." You're comparing yourself to unrealistic images, which messes with your self-esteem.

The Popularity Illusion

Likes and followers can make people seem super important. It makes you think your worth depends on these numbers, which isn't true.

Constant Exposure

You're seeing thousands of curated "perfect" lives every day, creating endless reasons to feel inadequate.

How it can affect you

  • Low self-esteem, anxiety, and stress.

  • FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out).

  • Unhappiness, believing your life isn't good enough.

  • Unrealistic expectations for your own life.

Beat the comparison trap

  • It's NOT Reality: Remember social media is just the "best bits," not real life. Everyone has struggles.

  • Focus on YOU: Your life, your achievements, your looks are unique and valuable.

  • Clean Up Your Feed: Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad. Follow accounts that inspire you.

  • Take Breaks: Step away from your phone! Experience real life and real connections.

  • Be Kind to Yourself: Talk to yourself like you'd talk to a best friend.

2.6 Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying is when someone uses phones, computers, or the internet to hurt, upset, or embarrass others on purpose. It can happen anywhere online, such as in chats, games, social media, texts, or emails. No one deserves to be bullied, in real life, nor online. If it happens, it’s not your fault, and help is always there.


What to do if you see cyberbullying

  • Don’t join in. Being kind online helps stop bullying.

  • Tell the person to stop if you feel safe doing so. Sometimes bullies back off when they know you don’t like it.

  • Save the evidence. Take screenshots or save messages. They can help adults understand what’s happening.

  • Tell a trusted adult. A parent, teacher, or guardian. You’re not snitching, you’re just staying safe!

  • Report the bullying. Most websites, games, and apps have ways to report bad behaviour.

Examples of cyberbullying

  • Sending mean or threatening messages

  • Spreading rumours or lies about someone

  • Sharing embarrassing photos or videos without permission

  • Excluding someone from a group online

  • Pretending to be someone else to trick or embarrass others

How to protect yourself

  • Keep your profiles private. Only accept friend or follow requests from people you know.

  • Think before you post. Don’t share anything that could be used to hurt you or someone else.

  • Block and report anyone who makes you feel uncomfortable or upset.

  • Be a good friend online. Support people who might be bullied and stand up for kindness.